Monday, July 27, 2015

Planting a peach pit, however poorly

Evelyn got in her head that she wanted to plant a peach pit.

We had just finished eating a peach that we bought that morning and I was explaining that the pit was a peach's seed.  (Yes, I know it's really the seed's casing thingamajig.  I'm not getting into the details with her when she spends so much time asking why the peach a seed in the first place.)  She wanted to plant th epeach and get a peach tree.

She loves stories where people plant seeds, she's fascinated by which seeds she can eat (peas!) and can't (cherries!), and we had just watched an episode of 'Olivia' where her favorite little pig princess planted a mystery seed and grew a Venus flytrap.  So I told her she could plant her peach pit after her nap.

After we'd buried it in a bucket with no drainage and she'd watered it twice, I read that we should have buried it in the winter.

Evelyn thought it would be helpful to read to the plant, because the cartoon told her she should, so she read a book about Olivia to the peach pit.  What else? 

Her planted peach pit is currently sitting underneath two inches of water, and has been for a couple of days now.  She's pretty indignant that it hasn't sprouted yet.  I try to explain how germination works, but I'm kind of enjoying her expectant optimism.  Something something faith of a child and all that.  It's a little confusing to see her fully expect to get everything she wants after a lifetime of living with parents who try to keep her at least somewhat tethered to reality, but I like her confidence.

Sunday, July 26, 2015

Fort Morgan (finally, I am posting pictures!)

Fort Morgan was super exciting and I loved it.

Cody and I had just watched some documentaries on lighthouses recently and so it was pretty exciting to see the lights that used to be in the lighthouse here.

Evelyn didn't understand most of the stuff we saw, in spite of our explanations, but she like anything big.

And she took this nice picture of us in front of the fort's museum/gift store.

We loved all the tunnels. My goodness, tunnels are so exciting!

The fort was turned over to the state for public use in the late 1960s, and a lot of the area is overgrown.  Even before then other buildings around the site were abandoned because of damage from storms and general dampness.  It was such a cool place to see, though.

Evelyn wanted me to take a picture of her trying to lift this anchor.

We didn't realize she was serious.

We loved this.  It was so cool.  And by "we" I mostly mean Cody and I loved it while Evelyn tolerated the experience with a minimum of whining.  It was incredibly hot and bright and there were a lot of stairs.  But she enjoyed singing in tunnels and touching cold wet bricks.  She also helped me pick out some postcards in the gift shop.  It was a really cool place to see because, well, history is neat. There's even a bird-watching trail that's probably really cool to check out when it's not so hot.  I'm really glad that we went.  I keep meaning to read up on it some more and I hope I will soon.

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Lists for everything

I have been hiking Pinnacle Mountain on Saturday mornings before Cody and Evelyn wake up for several months.  I take breaks for illness, extreme ice, and most recently a bruised tailbone.  I like the heat better than than the cold.

Spending more time outside just makes me want to spend more time outside.

I have mostly quit drinking Mtn. Dew in the past couple of months.  I feel calmer now, but apparently this is not noticeable to people.

The tiny sliver of relaxedness I brought back with me from vacation is pretty much gone thanks to a heavy workload, some concerns about loved ones, and my general inability to handle any stressors of any kind.

For example, I cried--twice--attempting to navigate a website and look at outfits for Evelyn tonight.  Maybe not having a working mouse is what does it.  Maybe I'm nervous about sending her off to pre-K.  Maybe the t-shirts were terrible enough to trigger a crying jag.  (Doubtful.)  Maybe the website was just that bothersome or maybe I just really would prefer to do this in a store even though salespeople make me sweaty and paranoid.  I want to touch the fabric and see if it's the 'right' texture and weight and hold the neckholes up to Evelyn's tiny shoulders.  Mom was offering to buy Evelyn some outfits (because Evelyn's grandparents buy most of her clothes) and I feel weird that I said "I'm just not feeling it" because that's rude and untrue but I didn't want to say "This is making me cry because that is what shopping does to me sometimes and has for a couple of decades now" even though we both know this fact about me.

I really don't like being on the computer all that much and have no idea what I'm doing on here when I'm going to try to go into work an hour early tomorrow to stare at a computer screen for the whole day and try to finish up some things on a deadline.

Sometimes I go to therapy.  I don't know how much it helps, other than I get to talk about things in my life for an hour while someone does not say "Why don't you just [do a thing that I have obviously considered before]?"  And that's pretty great.  That's actually huge.  We've discussed breathing and how I knit a lot and hike and try to get time with friends and also time alone and how it's still not enough because the major stressors in my life will remain giant stressors.  There are not enough hours in the day to take care of my family the way I want and need to because I'm not allowed to have them.  And that's it.  And that's how it's going to be, with a lot of time and energy allocated away from where I want to spend it.  We're hitting a busy and intense time at work that will go on for a couple of months where it feels like none of us can get away for fun or necessity. 

I miss getting to go to our library.  It's closed on Saturdays and it's hard to get there before it closes in the evenings.  I still haven't signed up for the summer reading program.  I want to and I will, but it's the middle of July and it bums me out that I haven't done it yet.

One thing I've been trying to do every day is make a list at the end of the day.  It's helping more than decluttering or journaling or exercise.  I write down what I've done.  I write down things I've done that make me happy, or that I felt were productive.  Seeing the words helps a lot.  Seeing things like "I threw out 5 magazines and moved 3 shirts to the 'donate' pile" or "I colored with Evelyn" reminds me of what I did that I felt were worthwhile and keeps the days from blurring together.  There are a lot of things that I get to enjoy, but they get overshadowed by all the things I worry about. 

So tonight my list will look something like this:
-ate 2 salads
-read a chapter out of The Horse and His Boy to Evelyn (we've been reading a chapter a night out of The Chronicles of Narnia to her)
-was honest on the Internet
-packed my lunch for tomorrow
-loaded the dishwasher
-unfriended someone on Facebook and unfollowed someone else because I don't like seeing them in my newsfeed
-glued a doll shoe back together

Lists always help.

Monday, July 13, 2015

We took a beach vacation!

We went to the beach!!

Cody and Evelyn and I drove out to Alabama to spend the week with his family on the beach.  And I took a picture of my gas mileage because I love my car so much.

I didn't take that many pictures (for me) because it was tricky to take my camera out on the sand or near the water with a kid or two in tow, and because I didn't take a week off from work (during a busy time on accident, no less) to carefully and conscientiously document things.  I got pictures of what I could and/or when Evelyn was in the mood to cooperate.  There was also a trip to Fort Morgan that I took a ridiculous amount of pictures of because it was just the 3 of us on that day and old buildings don't move all that much.   Anyway, here are some pictures.

There was a lot of this.

And some of this.  We got very touristy.

Evelyn wouldn't pose in the mouth of this and I was sad.

Evelyn packed a purse with a scarf and toboggan and maybe even needed her winter accessories in the air conditioning.  Here she is getting in her cousin's space while he tries to show her how to play video games.  They were pretty inseparable for the week.

And here's another baby cousin wishing she could join in the big kid fun.  She's really good at waving and trying new foods!

Evelyn got ahold of the camera for a while.  This is a quilt she's working on.

The kids painted a couple of afternoons.

Egan drew Evelyn as a pirate.

Hulk and Captain America.

Nathan's vacation shirts were spot-on.


Evelyn was an absolute water creature!!  She loved getting knocked down by the ocean waves and when we could haul her out into the water to float a little.  She also liked practicing her swim moves in the little pool there.

Not pictured: the three of us swimming in the ocean and letting waves carry us back to the shore.  Lovely.

I did attempt to take some nice pictures before we went out to dinner on the last night, but Evelyn was beyond exhausted and things were pretty disorganized because the entire house of people was trying to get ready to go somewhere all at once.  Evelyn fell asleep in the car and then Cody carried her around the restaurant unconsciousness. The last time that happened she was 11 months old.  Goodness.

This is the only picture I took of Casey, which is weird.  He swam with Evelyn a lot and did some fun uncle things.  But here he is with Cody while they both look excited about packing up and heading home.

I sneaked out the morning we left to get a few pictures of the beach.

Evelyn wore her pajamas all day long and spent a lot of time watching movies on the portable DVD player her Gram loaned us for the trip.  This came in really handy when we misplaced most of our books AND missed an exit and drove a long way before realizing it and took a two-hour detour in Louisiana.

Whatever. We get lost on every trip we take and it turned out fine.  It usually does.  Please enjoy the photos Evelyn took in a Mississippi Dairy Queen.  Goodness we were happy.

Well, we were happy for the whole trip.  That would sum it up.  We got in the ocean nearly every day, had peeling sunburns, played some games, spent a lot of time with family, and took in the sights of Gulf Shores (which is a very cute place because I have a thing for pastel houses on stilts apparently).  It was fantastic.